In my last blog, we got to speak to Suzy Reading about where she succeeds and doesn’t in her self care practice – the very specialty she talks on.
This mini series was born from the fact that when I wrote about how I’m not always very gentle, it was met with surprise so I want to continue to shine a light on these apparent setbacks or failures, and how they are indeed our strengths (as practitioners, as consumers, as whomever we may be).
Today I have the pleasure of introducing another Suzy (Ashworth) the Mindset coach and discovering her take on her own successes and ‘failures’ – a word that doesn’t necessarily enter her vocabulary any more.
Want to know how? Let’s find out…
Q1. You have been described as a mindset guru – how do you feel about this?
I do not love the word guru AT ALL for me. I am definitely not a guru, at least not in the way the word is banded around in the West. For me guru means someone who has a higher standing, because of their knowledge, and that doesn’t resonate with me or my mission at all.
While I think it’s totally sound and great practice to look to teachers/coaches/advisors/masterminds to facilitate changes in the way that we act, be and think, it makes me feel very vulnerable to be put on any kind of pedestal, no matter how small. Also, I think it’s very dangerous for any student of any subject to not view the value that they bring to a conversation, even in the questions that are being asked as just as important as the answers or the sign posts. Plus, the fact anyone you look up to has to trip up eventually, it’s far less painful for both those who are tripping and those who are witnessing the fall if you’re both experiencing this from the same view point.
Q2. Where do you feel you succeed the most in your own mindset in your life now?
Where I’m succeeding the most in my own mindset practice right now is understanding that doing more doesn’t equate to BEING more. BEING more has to be the focus if I want to impact more. How this is translating in my life and business is I’m finding it easier and easier to let go of the things that are no longer of service to me. Whether that’s old courses and programs or even businesses that I am releasing. Even old ideas, such as I don’t do cleaning. We have a cleaner once a week, but that isn’t enough for me to feel amazing about our home. So, by choosing to release the old story about cleaning not being my thing, I’m finding a huge amount of satisfaction in the process of making something clean and that then literally and metaphorically clears the way for new ideas, creativity and even more stuff to come in.
Q3. Although of course we want to celebrate successes, I’d love to know where you feel you ‘fail’ in your own mindset/confidence and what you learn from this?
Failing is an interesting word for me, it doesn’t really come into my frame of reference, because I’ve pretty much banished it. I don’t see it as failing, I see it as learning. The areas that I would say I’m learning the most are with the parenting of my 14-year-old stepson. I’m learning to really tune into what ‘unconditional love’ means in action, on a completely different level to the children that I have given birth to. Also, I’m learning to remember that upgrading my wealth/income/environment is not something that I have to wait 6 months or 12 months to do, it’s a choice that can happen in an instant although remembering the choice is just the first step.
Both of these situations teach me about where I choose to limit myself on what I think is possible, with or without certain conditions. It needs to be like this before I can earn this amount of money, or I can’t get over this issue in the family until x, y or z has happened. Both of these thought patterns are about conditions. That can be changed in an instant with a change in perspective and practicing the mindset traits and the BEING elements of where I am seeing the most success in life in business. I.E getting really clear on exactly what it is I want from a situation and then choosing to act in alignment with my desires. Choosing who I need to BE.
Q4. What do you think we could all learn from knowing that even experts or gurus don’t have it all together all of the time?
The minute you start valuing yourself as much as you do the people you perceive to be the most ‘successful’, the quicker you give yourself permission to shine as much as you perceive the people you have placed on a pedestal to shine. Additionally, when you treat everyone like you would want to be treated yourself you can be far more forgiving when you spot imperfections and getting it wrong in them and most importantly you.
Q5. What’s the one thing you think we can all do to help our mindsets (with money specifically or otherwise?)
The biggest thing you can do to help your mindset when it comes to money is understand that your personal value has nothing to do with how much money you do or don’t have in the bank. When you really start to get this, and combine it with being of service and putting your mission first, you can’t help but notice how money starts to flow more freely.
You can find out more about Suzy and her work here