I’ve been having a right old nostalgic trip down memory lane lately.
Looking at my IG from 3 years ago.
Some of my landing pages on my site.
An old sales page or two.
And I noticed something that made me feel melancholic. At some point during that time, I had quite a lot of services attached to my business:
2 group programmes running concurrently
up to 20 1-2-1 clients within the year
A membership community
Quite a few in-person speaking gigs taking place and being booked
This isn’t a post about how I wasn’t actually happy during that time and it was all crumbling – far from it, I was super excited and focused and motivated.
BUT I also knew that I wasn’t as efficient as I could be.
Not much about my business was automated then, and to this day not a great deal is but I’ve needed it that way so I can have the flexibility to shift and adjust as I’ve learnt and changed too.
I also knew that if I wanted to keep going with the high touch level of support I was used to giving, something had to give. I didn’t want to be online any more than I already was. I didn’t want to, at the time, train coaches to be my associates to run groups for me.
I didn’t want to develop a £300 downloadable course that felt like I had to constantly sell it and not be present for transformational change (none of those offerings are wrong by the way – they just weren’t right for me at the time, and I continue to review what IS right all the time now too)
But it’s interesting to me that a lingering feeling still exists. Which is this:
Without a paid community behind you, or without a significant following on some platform, or without the bells and whistles of a coaching business (ALL the services) will people trust you enough to ‘only’ come for high-ticket, high touch private coaching?
What I’m really asking is, do we look popular enough, worth-it enough, investible-in enough if we don’t have a huge audience or hundreds of raving fans able to share our stuff and provide numerous testimonials all the time?
The answer is SOMETIMES I DON’T KNOW!
I WANT to tell you ‘of course it doesn’t!!’
But you and I both know that numbers look great.
Numbers mean so much in this world and when you’re not into gathering numbers but gathering quality (with numbers, sure, but not numbers at the expense of quality) you do question so much about what’s in the marketing messaging around you.
What I WILL say for certain is that I also DO know – all the time in actual fact – that it doesn’t matter how popular we look (and ‘look’ is different to how popular we definitely/actually are – and wth does that mean anyway?)
AND that owning our message, our gifts, our way of being and sharing and showing up MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
It may not matter what platform that ends up being on (if you’re hating on IG at the moment, or if FB’s no longer your thing, or if you’re intrigued by LI) but it WILL matter what you’re able to contribute to YOUR corner of the internet and clients who matter to you, and who you matter to, too.
You, and I, get to decide how powerful we can be – you don’t need hundreds and hundreds of people behind you telling you this. You can choose it for yourself.
I KNOW how corny that sounds. It really does.
But I decided a long time ago that I can choose all of this.
Despite anxiety disorder, despite PTSD, despite peri-menopause ALL f*cking up my concentration, confidence, mental health and ability to work as well as I’d like, I still get to choose what my mind believes and allows to ruminate on.
(and boy, does it like to ruminate)
So, my melancholy, I think, was also seeing myself through the eyes of someone new.
Would they know I had all these services?
Ran a retreat?
Spoke on international stages?
Would they see how big my audience was at one point?
Would they base their assumption on how I look now, early 40s and, well, different (in stance, looks, whatever).
I mean, of course they would – we all do. But it doesn’t actually matter.
What matters is what I think, and what happens when I take action on what I think. And how strong I am in whatever I’m thinking.
Perhaps this melancholy is happening because I’ve had a baby, after 10 long years of ‘waiting’ (I mean, I didn’t just wait around, you know what I mean). I’m on the other side and it’s glorious and messy and muddly. Plus I only know HOW to be a parent during a pandemic – no wonder that’s making me re-think and review everything right now too.
As long as I am seeing myself through the eyes I want to see myself, all is well. As long as I’m not over-doing it, staying mentally content, living life and business in alignment, all is well. As long as I’m true to my values, and focusing on the present and forward, all is even better.
Being present and excited for what’s ahead.
I have the power to change all this with my mind first. Despite a mind that often tells me things aren’t safe, I should be smaller, I don’t deserve this.
I hope you also see what can be possible for you. When you put ‘the work’ in (and other elements too which we can’t forget – privilege, for example, and other elements of safety in my life which I don’t take for granted).
I’ll be talking more about harnessing your mind to work for you – in this case particularly around your coaching business and getting clients – next week for my events. You’ll learn things you can put into practice anywhere else in your life too.